The stuff that little Texan zombie goddesses are made of, living where the brains are served warm and the sarcasm is served raw.

The Adventures Of Zuzu Zombie, Undead Detective

Saturday, October 8, 2011

me love you long time

I have an addiction...besides my one to wine.

I am addicted...


Asian horror.

Can't help it. I think Asians are fucking hot. So does my 15 year old, but I digress.

Some of the better (and I use that term loosely) horror films in America are adapted from Asian horror. Here are a few of my favorites:


A man's photographs of a sexual assault haunt him and his new bride until justice can be served. Originally filmed in 2004 and acted out by people with really long names, it was Americanized in 2008 by Joshua Jackson (of Fringe fame) and Rachael Taylor (Grey's Anatomy). One of the better remakes. Besides, Joshua is freaking hot!


Who knows what lurks on the other side of the net? Originally filmed in 2001, the remake was poorly done in 2006 starring Kirsten Bell ("When In Rome" fame) and Ian Somerhalder (Goddess, those *eyes*!) Did you know that some of the original movies' scenes were used in the remakes commercials?

"One Missed Call"

Wonder what your death will sound like? Originally filmed in 2003, the remake wasn't too unbearable, although it was nothing like the first, starred Shannyn Sossamon ("A Knight's Tale"...loooove her!) and Edward Burns ("27 Dresses").


Even if your kid is horrible, don't dump the sucker in a well! The original was filmed in 1998 and remade in 2002 starring Naomi Watts ("Funny Games") and Martin Henderson (Yum!). This movie was creeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepy with that chick coming out of the well and all. Part two sucked ass (Sissy Spacek, really??), but even Ringu 2 was amazing.


Apparently, you shouldn't go to bed pissed off, but definitely *don't* kill someone or that shit will stick around forever! "Ju-on" was originally filmed in 2000 and the remake was done in 2004 starring Sarah Michelle Geller ("Buffy The Vampire Slayer" fame) and Jason Behr ("Skinwalkers" pretty). Again, what exactly is it with the creepy long haired Asian chick coming out of no where to scare the shit out of you? I don't know, but it works!

American horror has lost its ability to be scary and just gone for the "how much can we completely gross out our audience" factor ("Human Centipede" and "Hostel" anyone??). Asian horror, on the other hand, is completely cerebral. Makes you think...makes you watch...makes you wait...and then....


You get knocked out of your seat. Do they have blood? Oh yes. Are they sometimes over-the-top, totally, but that is what makes them so much freaking fun to watch! That is why America steals their ideas over and and over and over again. Companies like Asian Tartan Extreme know where to hit and how hard...and I love them for it!

My list of favorite Asian horror films is very very very long, and I will share some of the more off-the-beaten-path-but-need-to-be-seen ones later. Until then, watch for that photograph sent over the cell phone of the well on t.v. via the internet. Just saying....

Peace, Love and (why is there water around the t.v.??) Zombies \IiiI


Anonymous said...

There has to be some symbolism with the creepy long haired girl because she's in video games, too. There's one in Silent Hill 4 and Fatal Frame.

I almost named my youngest after
Samara from The Ring.

The original Asian films are way better than their American remakes.

Magaly Guerrero said...

I think I'm falling in love with you... And how wonderful it is that your girl likes them too!

When I was in Japan my friends used to make fun of me. I would spend half the night watching the scariest of flicks and then, according to them "Sleep with my eyes open and ready to punch anything that move" lol. It was true too. The rush was immense and it would make me have paranoid dreams.

Lin said...

Totally agree, Asians know messed up horror. Us on the other hand, we know how to ruin remakes haha.