The stuff that little Texan zombie goddesses are made of, living where the brains are served warm and the sarcasm is served raw.

The Adventures Of Zuzu Zombie, Undead Detective

Thursday, April 1, 2010

dear so and so-having a *bad* day

Dear body,

I hate you. It's obvious you hate me. Summer will come one day, and there is no way I will ever be able to wear anything other than the one pair of jeans I can barely fit into. You leave me no choice but to deny you any basic needs or enjoyment whatsoever. You don't deserve it. Fooker.

Sincerely,

Your self-loathing owner
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear face,

You are in cahoots with the body. You are flabby, falling, wrinkled, dull, dreary, drab, spotted, dotted and gross. Mirrors are my worst enemy because of you. Ain't no amount of makeup will ever make you worth looking at without screaming and running in the other direction. Screw you.

Sincerely,

Medusa's cousin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear God,

What did I ever do to you?

Sincerely,

.
~~~~~

Yeah, I'm having a very bad day. I know I am blessed, blah blah blah. Everyone gets to have a bad day. This is mine.

3 comments:

Debbie said...

Dear Penny....I'm not going to say everything will be fine...everyone deserves a bad day. But don't be so hard on yourself. :)

By the way....thank you for the award...I'm very flattered.

Sleepy Cat Hollow said...

Dear Penny,

Hmmmmm...me thinks I'm going to back out veeeerily slowly. :) But before I close the door and run...here's a Guinness!

Luvs,
Michelle

Anonymous said...

I've gotten to the point were I don't bother to look in the mirror anymore. It's not me staring back anyway. It can't be. I refuse to believe it is. lol