The stuff that little Texan zombie goddesses are made of, living where the brains are served warm and the sarcasm is served raw.

The Adventures Of Zuzu Zombie, Undead Detective

Thursday, July 17, 2008

cleveland bound

Today I am off to the exciting and culture-filled city of Cleveland, Ohio. Why? Well, for one reason and one reason only:

Infinite Grace 2008
Myself and four other women from my church, Theresa, Robin, Jennifer and Kris, will be taking off today at 3 p.m. We will try to avoid all the construction that makes Michigan the lame, er, great state it is, and get ready to attend one of the greatest Christian women conferences Ohio...sigh...but I
Women Of Faith is a two-day full-on, God-loving, lesson learnin', laughin', cryin', music havin' get-together with 8,000 of your closest friends. The speakers are fantastic, coming from every walk of life, every generation; there is always someone there who will end up talking to just you, if you know what I mean. There is nothing on Earth like looking around a huge arena and seeing your sisters in Christ, those coming to Christ, and those who just aren't sure, holding hands, loving on, hugging and crying with women that they have never met before but all share the same path: the desire to love and follow our Lord Jesus Christ, and to try and understand what it all means. That is the coolest part about it, that not all of those who attend are Christ-followers. We all fall under the same blanket of, dare I say it, grace, no matter if you accept it or not.
The last time I was in Cleveland I was in the 6th grade, and I went on a trip with my mom and dad, visiting all New York, Pennsylvania and Ohio. My father was born in Cleveland actually. For the past few days I have wanted to call him and tell him where I am going, but, let's face it, he already knows.
I am very much looking forward to this conference. It is called "Infinite Grace 2008", and I know that I could sure use some. "Grace" is defined as:
* a state of sanctification by God; the state of one who is under such divine influence
* elegance and beauty of movement or expression
* seemliness: a sense of propriety and consideration for others
* a disposition to kindness and compassion
I know that I have said it before, but I will say it again. The past few years have been hell for me mentally, physically and spiritually. I have been held down with a huge weight of anger, betrayal and general pissed-off-at-the-worldness. I want to move forward, but there are things holding me down to where I am, and they aren't letting go easily. I have had people tell me that I have to get over it, and I agree. But what hit me 6 years ago, before my mother's passing, was the size of an iceberg able to take out 1000 Titanics, or just one Penny. Maybe there will be something at this conference that helps give me the strength to move on, to let go, and do what I feel God telling me I need to do: to help others who have the same pain and, like me, no one to really know and understand it all. That isn't to say that people liky my husband, my best friend, her mom, can't help me, but they can't *know* what it is like to be, as I put it, erased. Maybe, just maybe, for a moment, I can lay down that weight, release the hands around my ankles, and start to walk again. Accept the grace back that was given to me on the cross. To be free. I go to this conference with an open and willing heart, and I know that God will be with me, all of us, every step of the way.
I still think I should have held out for the Dallas conference....


Lisa Quing said...

I hope the conference is all you want and need it to be! Have fun!

Anonymous said...

I agree about holding out for the Dallas conference. Sigh.

Have you tried Vodka? Because let me tell you sister, that'll cure what ails ya!! If you start a strict regimen of that, by early afternoon you won't even remember your name, much less what was bothering you!

There are some side effects. Of course. So be prepared for the state to take your kids away...and other stuff too.

Actually, maybe the conference is a better deal.

I love you. And I hope you are able to find what you need; what will help you. In the meantime, know that you are the most grace filled person I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. And I'll throw a shout out up to the big guy to see if he can't do something.

Love you!!!